I'm Interested in Interesting You Pt. 2

Okay, here's the problem with the human body. It does things that I am not aware of. The whole split between voluntary and involuntary muscular movement must've seemed like a good idea, and I guess I wouldn't want to have to be conscious for my heart to beat... yay vagus nerve X!... But when my body decides to feel pain, and I have no idea where it's coming from, I get very angry. Maybe if pain killers could work quicker, or perhaps if Marijuana was legal for everyone, I wouldn't be complaining. But I find my body annoying when instead of looking hot it's causing me discomfort. Not cool, body. Not cool.

But that's not the only thing I have against my body. What's up with suddenly feeling like having sex? Also not cool. I'm not getting an STD until I'm in the minority (25% of teenage females have an STD... guess who's still a virgin?) But regardless, I don't want to vacillate betwixt asexual "ewww boys" and down-right, fuck anybody, hedonism. I'm blaming my body for this one, because I'm pretty sure it's trying to get me pregnant. Stupid hormones. Why can't we talk about this, body, because clearly we have different priorities?

I guess this is more of a problem with my body. But I'm sure you've had those days when you've wished to attain some higher plane of existence that doesn't involve being a physical entity.

I feel like a 19th century philosopher, condemning the human body with all its vices. Or I could pull an Oscar Wilde and...
=I am hot, in the mood, and don't currently have any STDs. I would give out more information, but this is the internet. And via facebook you can probably find out TOO much about me.

This is in no way relevant:

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