Questions I have asked Google:

"can you have more than 2 alcoholic drinks a day if you start in the morning?"

And still nothing helpful pops up. Although I have learned that if you don't drink two days in a row, you can't go through alcohol withdrawal. Which I suppose is good to know (although I don't believe it).

I have drank more than a bottle of wine in the last two days. By myself. I haven't woken up with any hangovers. I wonder if this is just the "holiday spirit." Regardless, it's pretty ominous.

Sadder still is the realization that I probably wouldn't be drinking this much wine if I had a brita filter, another source of clean (not tap) water, or diet coke. I only have orange juice in my fridge, and as a diabetic, I'm opposed to drinking something with that much sugar in it.

I'm drinking wine because I'm thirsty.

If you ever doubted it: I am a really dumb human being.