you want to kill yourself? I did. But wait! There's alcohol. Alcohol puts everything in perspective. YOU ARE NOT THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE! You are one person. And everything that's happened to you has happened to at least one other person in the history of humanity. So cheer up! Ironic that you thought you were too forward and the two guys you had your sights on now have girlfriends? NO! That has had to have happened before! So cheer up! Because in the ancient times, the woman in your situation ended up with a King. Does that not cheer you up? That down the line there will be a man who is not only attractive (one of those guys), but also strangely similar to you in likes and dislikes (the other of those guys), and you will consummate the most amazing coupling ever witnessed in the area code of "847."
Yes indeed. Alcohol allows you to widen your perspective; to understand that even those things that seem unlikely are, nonetheless possible. If you doubt this: don't. I am drunk in this current moment. Just a few second ago I began to hiccup, and I began to feel bile building in my esophagus. But I never once doubted the wisdom of my words, because alcohol is the all-knowing substance that conquers all. I know people who prefer the equally agreeable cannabis to simple alcohol. Although I have only been "high" once, I must counter that I have never felt so logical and happy as I feel know. Alcohol is truly great, and potentially, the builder of civilization. Agriculture, that promoted civilization, and the creation of population-dense cities, may have been spurred by wo/mankind's need for staple crops that had the potential to create alcohol, such as wheat and barley.
Nevertheless, I digress. Key points: My heart has been broken. I realize now that I will never, in this year, be able to have the people, although there are only two, that I want. My dreams have been crushed, for I realize now that although I have been accepted into the medical school of my choice, I am still worried about what I will achieve in my remaining year at Colgate University, the school that has grown on me tremendously.
Life is a depressing gamble. You set your sights too low and you die accomplishing nothing. Set your sights too high and you die achieving few of your goals. But what is death? Today my pet turtle died, and I screamed and bawled and writhed on my kitchen floor, cursing my ineptitude. But s/he was dead, and there was nothing I could do. Death is but an end point. And as a rather intelligent fellow once told me, although I now hate his guts for leaving... "Life isn't great, but it's all we have", so I must acknowledge that I won't be able to achieve everything I've ever dreamed of.
But God, if you exist, or ELORA! I know you exist, and I know you can be strong when the need arises, PLEASE! Achieve the few goals that you care about. Today, one of your closest friends remarked that you cared primarily of "education" and "public health." Achieve your goals in these and you can forget that some many years ago you were humiliated and crushed when not one, but two individuals who you thought highly of for their attractiveness and similarities in world views decided to get girlfriends because you failed at likely the most important aspect of the three categories that governs Love, proximity: of proximity, similarity, and physical attractiveness.
God Bless You, elora apantaku. I wish you nothing but the best.
(dear audience, I am royally smashed, so goodnight to y'all).
"If you're ever suicidal,
don't forget to dial,
411 so they can prescribe'
some good vodka in a bottle!"
No comments:
Post a Comment