ResLife Burn in Hell

This is what I said:

Apologies. Considering I gave my room key to the next occupant (Jackie Colborne) of my room, 106 in 94 Broad, it would be easier and more cost efficient to just assure yourself that she has my key. But if you really must rekey the room, go ahead. It'll just add to the confusion, though.

Just thought you should know.

This is what I wanted to say:
Dearest ResLife,
Fuck You. Fuck you and your imbecilic approach to assigning living arrangements to the very few number of students at this school. You want to charge me $75 because I forgot to hand in a key? Shouldn't you ask me for the key first? Doesn't that make the most sense? Or are you all unqualified for what I can only imagine is a job your superiors have set about making as unnecessarily complicated as possible. I took it into my own hands to give my room key to the next occupant of my room, because I, unlike you, am efficient. EFFICIENT! And I'm only fucking 19 years old. Honestly, it's like you guys have no clue what's going on. But that's alright. If you really must rekey the room, due to an unwillingness to break from horribly constructed protocol, go ahead. It'll just add to the confusion, though, not like you've ever shown yourself to do anything but confuse people. So I guess, good job. Congratulations in taking the DMV down a notch, for you truly are, the most frustrating institution in the United States of America.

Just thought you should know.